The Soulmate Connection – Why is He So Afraid?

Entangled minds that roam the earth together– You meet each other in your dreams.

You know what is going on with the other person and they are a distance away.

The connection you feel with each other has an energy that is outside of this dimension, and ahead of what this realm is ready for.

 

A soulmate connection for most, comes with great costs. For many this connection is bittersweet. With so much love and a sense of true communion and unity, it also feels like there is so much weight to bear with it.

He runs. Why?

When I have been contacted to be of assistance to someone trying to find clarity about soulmate issues, a common thread is that he will run. He will create distance. He refuses to commit. If he doesn’t run, he finds a way to not go any deeper. It’s just too much.

For some, he promised after the divorce, he would find you, but he’s with another woman, knowing that you are the partner that would create an incredible life for him. For both of you.

The good souls that I speak to about it want to know why. What the hell is going on? I wish the answer was simple.

Knowing that this relationship transcends the energy of the earth and moves into a realm that we are just beginning to try and understand, ironically, this is exactly one of the reasons he runs. The energy and its power is foreign.

The nature of a man and male energy is not primarily emotional. While you may share so many different ranges of very deep emotion together, being in that space experiencing such great power is more foreign to him than it is to you. Not understanding something is an open door for things to become unwieldy. It can be scary.

The depth of the feelings–the wonderment that all of this energy brings has probably even been so immense for you at times that you have even felt scared. We as women being in practice with “feeling” are usually able to get a handle on our hearts and not let fear tend to take over so much in this area.

For men, the intensity is enough that it drives him insane. As if you both don’t already ask each other, “What do we do about us?”, for him the love and other reeling emotions are so intense that the blessing of this relationship becomes his personal hell.

All the while you’re ready to take the plunge. Ready to dive in and experience all of the greatness and stand in your power together as equals; King and Queen of the realm you’ve created together. Ready to create and receive the most amazing gifts that God or the Universe could ever have put in your hands and he turns away.

What the real truth is for both parties that makes it so bittersweet, is that we know what fear is, and the number one reason that the relationship may not ever be what you hope, is exactly because the fear is overwhelming, and this is where it becomes complex.

There is fear that the success of the relationship will create too much power than he knows how to handle. Fear that what you will both create on a different level is so far outside of the comfort zone, it may cause hurt to a level that has never been felt before if you fail. Fear that this kind of love isn’t deserved or hasn’t been truly earned. Fear that for whatever reason the feelings are so expansive and the potential for success surpasses what we can conceive, it’s easier to not go there. It is more painful than fun.

It doesn’t seem to make sense that one could be overwhelmed with so much love they can believe that your life together would be the best thing for both of you, and not go forward with it.

In terms of what is in “this realm” and how to relate it to “that realm”, the best I can do is relate it to that job you may have once dreamed or fantasized of having outside of the country on a whole other continent, and you never took the leap to move there and do it.  Knowing full well it would have earned you incredible success, and that it was entirely possible to do it. All you had to do was go.

As mediocre as that example is, it is the only way I can describe how he fears taking that leap. The “move” requires so much to leave behind and start over with–and the new place being so foreign among other things is just so risky without having any guarantees on an outcome, it creates heavy conflict. It’s easier to dream about it and be with it for short periods of time, than to actually live that life moment by moment.

It is no consolation to have it explained away on account of fear. We know that fear is irrational. We know that it is an illusion and a made up story about events that have not yet occurred, but that is what the running is all about. Fear runs deep within us and has more control of the things we choose to have or not have in our lives than we give it credit for. But that is what it is. It is a travesty, I know.

And because it is no consolation and you still don’t know what to do or say to him that could possibly change things to move in a more favorable direction, I can only offer my blessings to you to for peace of mind and healing of the heart. I will let you know that you are not alone by any means. Many soulmate connections experience these issues. They are very real, and the feelings of heartbreak truly run deep.

What I offer as my best advice to anyone if it makes it easier, is to begin to practice this:  Let it be.

Be with each other expecting nothing but to be together. Enjoy your time. Want nothing more. Continue to grow and expand and share your wisdom with one another. If it is not in the stars for you to be together in this realm or in this lifetime, let it be. Stop wasting time on wanting more. Just be. That is how this love was created. From both of you standing in the light of just being.

The Universe has given you a gift to enjoy. It has given you everything you wanted in terms of feeling loved and letting you know that yes, you do deserve that kind of love. It is offering you the experience. Want nothing more than to just be with what you have. I know that it hurts to want it your way and not have it. I know that there is resentment about it. I know the pangs of wanting to just have him in your arms forever and not ever have to leave.

With gifts –we accept them as gifts and want nothing more if we truly receive them as such. Apply this to any gift you have ever received and have been grateful for, and you will see the connection. Let the gift be a gift. Want nothing more, and just enjoy being with it as often as you can.

Be grateful for the experience, because you can apply this to other areas of your life, and yes you can create it again, because you were given the tools with this gift to know how to do it. Don’t let fear tell you that you cannot.

 

Namaste,

Violet